Talc Near Disaster Quick Recovery

     Like I said, we survived.  The talc thing grew, bigger than
we could have possibly imagined.  I wanted to move on and
diversify.  I knew there was a huge untapped Lysol market out
there, especially among kids who wanted to do nothing more than
disfigure their friends with the old Lysol flamethrower gag.  
     But he was adamant.  "We diversify, we spread ourselves
thin.  I know one thing, and that's TALC!  No aerosol, no holes
over Antarctica.  Just pure, good talc.  Nature's--"
     "But the Dunwich Bill--"
     "Fuck the Dunwich Bill."
     There was a lot of grassroots support for the Dunwich bill,
which, if it passed, would effectively destroy our business. 
     "They just smell money.  They don't care about quality
product.  Christ, look at the post office.  What's next?  Kiddie
porn at Blockbuster?  Cheap, legal talc.  Never.  You sanitize
talc, you destroy the mystery, the jouissance, the howdoyousay,
jenesaisquoi.  No one will care.  No one will ever again talc up
and listen to Patty Larkin or Happy Rhodes.  Is that the kind of
country you wanna live in?  I sure as hell don't.  I'll fight
Dunwich every step of the way." 
     "But they're already talking treatment programs, rehab
centers, clinics...new jobs, lower taxes...I don't think we can
stop this."
     "Bah.  flimflammery, window-dressing.  It's all about money
ain't a damn thing--"
     "Funny.  I'm not arguing.  I'm just thinking of *our* bottom
line.  Let's just say it *does* pass..."
     "We've weathered storms before.  Remember when they found
Grishna?"
     Grishna was the name they'd given to a thirty thousand
metric ton talc that was discovered in the Ukraine.  Prices
dropped to less than a buck a key for months.  
     "I remember.  I was six months in hospital."
     "Huh?  What the fuck kind of speech is that?"
     "It's affected.  I blame the talc."
     "C'mon.  We got a long day."

     I spotted a regular.  Raggedy thing, tatterdemalion, but I
liked her.  
     "Hey, girl.  Who's your friend?"
     She turned away.
     "What's up?"
     "I'm off the ride.  They're doing random piss-testing in
school.  Every fifteen students."
     "They can't--"
     "In loco parentis."
     "Bastards."
     "And with this siacylic talc bonding to mucoproteins, it's
gonna show up."
     "Listen, I like you."  I reached into my bag.  I took out a
can of Lysol that I'd sandblasted down to just the canister. 
"Try some a this."
     She pointed it into her mouth and I grabbed it out of her
hand.
     "No!  Don't do that.  Watch."  I struck a match and held it
against the nozzle and did the flamethrower thing.  She was
mesmerized.
     "How much?"
     "Take it."
     I watched her run off and incinerate a curious squirrel. 

     She'd be back.