Selected-By: m-atkinson@nwu.edu (Michael A. Atkinson)

The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply.
Your question was:

> I'm looking for some good onion rings. Do you have a good recipe, or do
> you know a good place to find some?

And in response, thus spake the Oracle:

} Well, the recipe for making them was lost during the Second Age of
} Middle Earth, but the following ancient poem does tell where to
} find them:
}
}       Tree-rings for the Elven kings in the wood,
}       Napkin rings for the Dwarf-lords at a feast;
}       Herrings for fishermen (smoked are good),
}       Onion rings, with slaw and rare roast beast.
}       In the land of Mordor, where the shadows lie.
}
}         Onion rings to rule them all,
}         Onion rings to find them,
}         Onion rings to bring them all and in the darkness bind them.
}         In the land of Mordor, where the shadows lie.
}
} You owe the Oracle a crowned rack of lembas.