Path: news.cinenet.net!syix.com!news-spur1.maxwell.syr.edu!news.maxwell.syr.edu!howland.erols.net!newsxfer3.itd.umich.edu!uunet!in4.uu.net!209.48.224.41!news1.radix.net!saltmine.radix.net!not-for-mail From: moe@Radix.Net (Ted Frank) Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Subject: Re: Proof that Lisa is INVISIBLE TO COPS Date: 21 Sep 1997 15:01:01 -0400 Organization: RadixNet Internet Services, Md. USA Lines: 52 Message-ID: <603qtd$9vr@saltmine.radix.net> References: <5vna0o$56i$1@quasar.dimensional.com> <5vuarf$b3a$2@e3000.supernews.com> NNTP-Posting-Host: saltmine.radix.net Xref: news.cinenet.net alt.religion.kibology:40461 X-Cache: nntpcache 1.0.6 (see ftp://suburbia.net/pub/nntpcache) In article <5vuarf$b3a$2@e3000.supernews.com>, Karlo Takki wrote: >DOGS *LOVE* RIBS. Dogs love *trucks*, as the commercial with the dog going "Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! Baconbaconbacon!" clearly demonstrates. Bring back the chuck wagon, that's what I always say. Sometimes in the most inappropriate circumstances, too, which has created awfully embarassing moments. Three recent signs, all in the same day, that are increasing evidence that I'm a grown-up. * Court-TV left me a voice-mail asking for a quote. If I had been in the office to answer the phone, I would've said "No comment." As it was, I just didn't return the phone call. * I was in a meeting with two other grownups, and I told a vaguely humorous joke to demonstrate a larger point, and they both felt the need to laugh politely for fear of offending me. * I got a phone call from a rabbi apologizing for a story he told me and Kia the night before, fearing that he had offended my sensibilities and I would no longer want to pay him $500 to officiate our wedding. Also: what's the deal with this whole Raven plotline in Spiderman? * After a few weeks of ominous hullabaloo, Kingpin kidnaps homeless person. * Kingpin subjects homeless person to experimental and involuntary surgery to attach titanium wings. * Now-empowered homeless person/Raven is told to get Spiderman, or else. * Unseen character shift sends Raven chasing after Spiderman with glee. * Somehow, everyone learns that winged lunatic is to be called "Raven." * Spiderman gets his butt kicked by the Raven, but at the last second... * Professor Deus Ex Machina shows up with a heretofore unseen in the plot magic gun that melts the titanium wings (but causes no harm to the underlying person, other than altering his trajectory to fall softly into a sand truck) and * Spiderman, for no apparent reason, takes the weapon from the complete stranger and uses it successfully. * Wingless Raven is arrested (for what? acting under duress to attack someone who is a wanted fugitive who isn't going to show up to testify in court?), with no consequences to Kingpin or Professor who performed surgery in first place. * Spiderman returns home, having done nothing, to accolades from Mary Jane, IYKWIM, AITYD. In the real-life time this sequence took place, meanwhile, governments fell, tv series premiered and died, and continents drifted. Someone please explain.