Newsgroups: alt.religion.kibology Path: news.cinenet.net!news.ececs.uc.edu!news.kei.com!newsfeed.internetmci.com!su-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!cpk-news-hub1.bbnplanet.com!news.bbnplanet.com!newsfeed.internetmci.com!in1.uu.net!uucp5.uu.net!world!mmcirvin From: mmcirvin@world.std.com (Matt McIrvin) Subject: Re: Sec. Cohen's anti-net speech Sender: news@world.std.com (Mr Usenet Himself) Message-ID: <19970612143710415670@ppp0a023.std.com> Date: Thu, 12 Jun 1997 18:37:10 GMT References: <5mp3og$uso$1@as1000.javanet.com> <5n2mva$ljg$21@nw003.infi.net> <3398e8af.1337145298@fullnews.neosoft.com> <33979f0b.21817446@news.tafensw.edu.au> <339b5c0d.1563321672@fullnews.neosoft.com> <339f8e1b.4229944@news.onramp.net> <33a93ae1.1948103091@fullnews.neosoft.com> <33ad514c.34063324@news.onramp.net> <33bf213c.2007083223@fullnews.neosoft.com> Nntp-Posting-Host: ppp0a007.std.com Organization: Software Tool & Die, Brookline MA X-Newsreader: MacSOUP 2.2 Lines: 56 Xref: news.cinenet.net alt.religion.kibology:32782 LawyerBoy 0.01 - snip NOSPAM!! to reply wrote: > Maybe a CGI-image map of the world (Mercator map?) with a clickable index > of Kibologists' home(countries, states, cities) would be do-able. I'm sorry. The Mercator projection, used in every map ever made by evil giant ethnocentric map companies, is EVIL! EVIL! By vastly magnifying the sizes of Greenland and Antarctica, it expresses a deep chauvinism in favor of these heavily industrialized areas of the world. Also, the Mercator projection always puts the United States in the exact center, by virtue of its arbitrary placement on the Greenwich Village meridian, when in fact it is closer to the edge. (Some manufacturers may insist that they do *not* in fact use Mercator maps, but our research indicates that their projections are actually just Mercator projections with additional, camouflaging mathematical distortions applied!) Instead it is urgent that we encourage atlases and classrooms to use the McIrvin projection, the only equal-area map projection yet discovered. Well, the only rectangular one. Well, at least, the only rectangular one that is taller than it is wide, thereby accomodating the Golden Mean and the natural orthography of the elongated human form! Accept no substitutes. The McIrvin projection represents all nations fairly by giving them the only *fair and democratic* allotment of surface area, one that gives equal area to all peoples, all principal products, all economic systems, and all languages and religions, namely *zero* area. Other map projections attempt to represent the curved Earth accurately by introducing interruptions into the flat map. This may only be done with perfect fidelity, however, by introducing an *infinite number* of interruptions. This the McIrvin projection does by representing the Earth's surface as a Cantor dust of discontiguous points. While this results in a *countable* number of points, of lower cardinality than the Earth's surface, the points omitted are also omitted in *standard* geographic atlases, as simply proven by looking in the index. Do you see any *irrational* latitudes or longitudes? NO! The map is printed in convenient, portable form, as a perforated roll of thin paper mounted on an axle (11.43 cm x 10.16 cm, 250 pages/roll), eliminating the difficulties in folding conventional maps. It is recycled (over 1% post-consumer content), biodegradable, and 2-ply, and is available in "under-the-roll" and "over-the-roll" editions. Also available are the pocket-size Student Edition (with FREE bonus of "Mappin'", the Lively Game of Culturally Sensitive Map Projections), the special Travel Edition in individual sheets (courtesy Amtrak), the Grand Potentate Edition in extra-wide, gilt-edged paper and mahogany axle, and the US MILSPEC Edition in fine, coarse, and carborundum. John Sladek will now explain the joke. -- Font-o-Meter! Proportional Monospaced ^ http://world.std.com/~mmcirvin/